"Weeping may be for the night but when dawn breaks, comes joy. After several days of introspection and solitude, today I roared back to life. Early this morning at 5am sharp, I was reflecting over several things and my heart was pained as I thought about my current situation. It is as if I was bereaved of my children, my church, and my community. Where are all my friends? When I look out, there was none who comforts. But as I opened my Bible as I usually do every morning, every dawn or pre-dawn and sit before Lord, my eye came upon the passage from Isaiah 49:20 KJV "The children which thou shalt have, after thou hast lost the other, shall say again in thine ears, the place is too strait for me: give place to me that I may dwell." How incredible and how remarkable.
When I read this verse, I knew it was the Lord who was speaking to me. "Don't worry about former church members, former students, and former friends. Though you may have lost them, you will have new children and they shall be plentiful compared to the old." Then the next verse sealed the deal. "removing to and fro" as if the Lord knew how often I had moved from one place to another. Feeling unsettled and unwelcome in a new place. When I read Isa 49:20-21, my spirit soared again, and it is still riding high after 7 hours. My whole outlook changed. For the first time, I called myself an STS lecturer. For the first time, I thought I might bear fruits in this place. For the first time, I had this sense of elation that I could publish not just one book but several before my next move comes along. It's a part of my calling as an exile and wanderer, a refugee for Jesus' sake. This desolation and this forsakenness is a sign of God, a God who came in the flesh and when He hung on the cross, He felt forsaken by His Father for the sake of mankind.
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