A Pastor's Observations

After three days our Pastors' Conference, I was still thinking about what God was saying to the Church and to me specifically. I had several meaningful encounters with pastors, young and old, male and female and one has stood out because she said things to me that no one had said before. First, she told me she had known me in her teenage years, perhaps through her sisters who are also active in ministry. She said that it was essential for a leader to look out for the whole Church, and not just one particular race ("satu suku").

Next Book Project

After talking with my senior leaders, it appears that it is going to take a while for them to find me something to do, so in the meantime I will occupy myself with writing. Yesterday I rested from the hectic two full days and two nights’  Pastors’ Conference and I have been praying since I completed my John’s Gospel’s commentary in mid-May about which book should I commentate on next. I think I found the answer but when I start writing, I will announce it here.

Growth (Decline) of the Church

If attendance is any indication of church growth, this year's Conference was an eye opener. In fact, it attracted close to 300 pastors. Last year's attendance was sparse so much so the visiting speaker commented on it and said he hoped the numbers would double the next time he visits Sabah. His suggestion was great, if one pastor encouraged one or two people to become pastors, in 5 years the numbers would double. Why numbers matter?

Pastors' Conference

I attended in full our Pastors' Conference two full days and two nights and I only missed yesterday's afternoon session. I must say I enjoyed it, prepared mentally and spiritually for it. I learned a fair bit from it, especially encouraged to listen to my fellow pastors, most of whom are now my juniors and they did splendidly. This morning's session about how to pastor in the End-Time turned out to be my favourite. It went for one hour and five minutes but the anointing and his gift of telling a story won through.

Restful Day & Fellow Pastors

After reading the whole manuscript of John 13-21 one more time from Friday to Monday yesterday, today I decided to take a break while praying what book or thing that I want to do come June 2026. Tomorrow is our Pastors’ Conference and I hope there will be at least 300 pastors attending out of 400 plus full time workers in our denomination. I used to follow the Conference religiously without fail until after the pandemic, I had not attended a full Conference except the night services.

Final Week in May

This month is full of surprises. Like a roller coaster with many ups and downs. There is much waiting and my patience is tested.  I waited patiently for my proofreader to complete the work and it was on time but it took me much longer to do the corrections as during the two weeks the proofreader was reading my book, I revised the book, about 20 percent which was a big deal and it took me close to middle of May before I sent my final manuscript to my printers.

20 Years Blogging

I just realised that I had gone past 20 years in blogging. I started middle of May 2006 in my first pastorate and three months ago I concluded my fourth pastorate. It’s been quite a ride. I stopped blogging for a whole year, perhaps when I turned 70 I will say why, but since returning as Revelation is Real 2.0 it is now in the 14th year since 2012.

Between Times

I am now between the times of having completed a new book and planning to start another book project. I am amazed at the grace of God helping me write to a level that I am happy about, more over in Malay which is not my primary language, though it has been my main language of ministry for 31 years and six months. So people consider me proficient in both languages, not something unusual in Malaysia, though probably very few who are bilinguals like myself could write books and theological books for that matter.

21 Ringgit Left

Yesterday when I went out of a Mall’s carpark my debit card was rejected for insufficient funds. Today I banked in RM200.00 as I normally used the card for small disbursements like car park fees. What if I did not have any money in my other accounts? I realized in my life that for nearly 40 years now, I lived by faith. In 1991 I did not know if I could survive keeping my law firm running as business was bad. Even in those bad times, I managed to pay the salaries of my two workers, rent for office and house and car loan. I never owed any money that I could not repay in time.

Middle of Time

As there are no specific commitments for me in recent weeks, sometimes I was caught unaware of time, something rare for me as I have a habit looking at the time, keeping a diary of events far ahead and planning ahead at all times. I have been so occupied with the book that sometimes I did not care when I slept and when I got up. It could be as early 3 am (going to bed early) and by 4am I would be going about writing, checking and editing my book until late morning before going for early lunch or brunch.

To what End?

When Jesus stood before Pilate, and challenged to say whether he was a king, Jesus' response was telling: For this or to this end, I was born, which means he was born to be king and to witness to the truth (John 18). As I am in my early 60s now, perhaps it is not too late to reflect, though I once said if one was in his or her 40s and know not what to do, then it is surely time to gather oneself and make oneself useful so that one's life could be meaningful. It is never too late to reflect. Even now in the past three months, I began to reflect - to what end was I born? What are my primary gifts?